Cengkerik

Weekend retreat

is always fun for the children
as they learn the many sounds
coming from trees and shrubs

and I really have to create stories
about birds and insects
as if I know all
when they ask

"tu bunyi apa ayah?"


dienn.....................

Lienn dan rienn

Lienn and Rienn

seronok sangat
bila buka gift box
Ummi pun jenguk
heran apa yang bising.

Ayah baru balik...




dienn........................

Lienn menjengket

aku nampak dari jauh

lienn menjengket
ambil sponge
cuci pinggan

dan terdengar
banyaknya buih ummi





................................ dienn

lienn and rienn

lienn will always be kaklong

in the way she behaves
and how she looks after rienn

and i have been observing
how she calls adik
in her ways



adiiiiiiiikkkkkk
adik
aaaaadikkk


adik sentiasa faham
cara kakak panggil
dalam bentuk
sayang, manja
marah, 
memujuk
mengarah
memaksa....



as long as they understand each other
it's alright with us.....




dienn..............................

lienn performing

one of many nights

that we went out
and on that Saturday night
lienn was the reason

it was the night, lienn got up the stage
in her university for kids
one story telling followed by one dancing
we enjoyed every minute of it
and I saw tears at the corner
of ummi eyes...........she was so happy.
and lienn and her friends had fun

rienn wasnt able to see all
because she slept all the way through
in my arms, my steady strong arms
ehemm........

lienn's media uncle came along
with some other uncles and aunties
and with cousins too
the media uncle took video and did some editing
and the next weekend we had fun watching
with everyone else at grandma's place

lienn blushed a little bit...
malu-malu pulak........................


and by popular request
lienn did it all over again....
and grandma's house shook like theatre...






dienn......................................

Ummi ngajar ngaji

Aku sendiri lupa

sejak bila lienn belajar

sebut alif ba ta dan mengeja

tapi hari ini, Lienn dah baca juz pertama.

Ngaji, acara wajib  anak-anak dan ummi 

tiap-tiap lepas maghrib,  hari hari....

sebelum Lienn mula duduk belum berdiri

dan reti sebut dan baca macam anak kecil..

Tapi kini,

Lienn dah lancar,

dia sendiri call opah

bagitau "lienn dah baca Quran.."

rienn pula dah selesa sebut alif ba ta.....
 pelat cara dia, macam eliss juga...

aku jangka lienn akan khatam
dalam tempuh tidak lama, sekejap.
kerana dia bukan baca merangkak
dia baca dengan selesa, kenal huruf , baris dan rangkap.

..............................................dienn

ummi the mother

describing ummi as thin and tall

is a little bit simplistic
and saying ummi, not active in sport
definitely put ummi as being fragile.

she has kelantan roots
with arabic blood along the line
but she never mastered the accent
for being  born in KL.
where she grew up thereafter.......
and in fact I can speak kelantanese better.
ehemm....

she is KN as you know
she is ummi as the two hug for comfort
she is a lady, very soft spoken
she is delicate, cepat terasa.

Over the years we been together
We learn to understand each other
There were times she had to endure my presence
There were times I had to appreciate her presence.

Getting into wedlock, so arranged
Life was extremely cautious
for everyone's sake so to speak
until Lienn came into picture......

the day KN became a mother.....
and slowly the constraints fade away...
but my mind still get itself locked
with dreams of yesterday
on what could have been....

I look at them, the three
they are depending on me
expecting husband and daddy
as what should forever be







dienn..............................
next: ummi ngajar ngaji

she did it once

lienn is big enough
to grasp on norms and expectations


once
she had something to say
while i was engaged in discussion with a friend

"Lienn, can you wait a while"

i saw slight change in her mood
ummi was quick to notice
and quickly took lienn to one side
and settled her concern

and after that
lienn has some understanding
about norms and expectations.
about courtesy in conversation




...................... dienn
next: I call, I sleep

of the two

i wonder

how much they learn
from one another

of rules and regulations
of necessity for good behaviour
of having fun in life
of dream and make belief world
of staying as a family

i have seen lienn
playing the role of big sister
taking care of little sister
in more ways than we thought possible

i have seen in them
the level of tolerance
as they play and have fun

but lienn waste no time
in correcting her little sister
as any kak long would normally do
even suap adik makan..........
even marah kalau sepah2.....


I thought lienn is a little bit cerewet....







................................ dienn
tomorrow: she did it once

how they differ

of course

lienn rienn

no one is the same
that goes to lienn and rienn

they differ slightly in look
one more of ayah and the other of ummi
but their mannerism is quite similar

however their basic character
is very unique
one is very meticulous
deep into details
she can draw like real
she can easily relate to different age groups
and leading role is her forte

and the other is still young
but has  wide spectrum of mood.
kuat meragam
however
she has elements of likeable mannerism.
and quite a fast leaner.....

I love both of them.



dienn...........................
tomorrow: of the two

Nasi Arab Cyberjaya.

there is one little restaurant in Cyberjaya
not Saba,  most famous there
but Hummurabi, being a bit smaller
ummi loves the privacy of the place
of eating without too many around.
and of course to avoid crowd,
we pick middle of the month.

Lienn loves to say this
"Ayah, can you finish it?"
I just smile
"I will order one more.."

Lienn loves to help ummi
hand in hand finishing up a plate
of their favorite dish  mandi,  and mine haneeth
while Rienn just play along cubit sikit-sikit






dienn
___________________
tomorrow : a large bird

lienn demam

changing weather
affects lienn this time

but rienn stays tough and healthy

something is terribly missing
as lienn the little noise maker
stays quiet for a while


dienn...........

the big sister

she had enough training

by the best mentor, ummi

having to put toys back

to where they come from.

It's about repetitive experience

over days and weeks

then experience turns into habits

and that's the way we grow.

and now 

she really behaves like big sister

getting rienn to put toys back

to where they come from.

and I always feel like laughing

as she helps rienn

and keeps saying

adik, simpan balik

nanti sepah

ummi marah

and she says that
in such jovial rhythmic manner
with eyes and lips, wide grinning.

_____dienn_____

she learns to decide....

Blue is almost exclusively mine

in cloths i wear

but over recent years i mellow a little bit

allowing ummi to choose concept

for occasions like Raya

and recently as we were flicking through brochures

ummi asked lienn which one she prefer

and surprisingly she said blue......

blue?.... ummi asked

and she just giggled

saying.... macam ayah.

so we all go blues.........

............... dienn.

she joined once....

we let her had a feel
to go through 8 raka'ats
but she just did Two
and for the rest of time
she ventured around
with peers, her age...

and back home
she would tell everyone
that she had  new friends.

Oh lienn...






..................... dienn

so she tried

yes she did

Lienn Fasting - an intro 

as prelude to Eid
for her, the first time
a long hard intro, our lienn.





................... dienn

I thought Lienn

We were playing with sticks
over shadows

and I thought about certain things
of zohor and asar
on shadowy space

and she was lucky then
to understand the most unsual
shadow of kabah.

oh lienn





............................dienn

when b is d

Why would she do that

playing with trick
with eyes so naughty
with smile half hidden
and ready to explode into laughter

she would tease
as she purposely replace b with d
u and n

there would be a pause
she just waits for our reaction
and she is ever ready to laugh
or to jump and run....

hmmm..... my lienn




................................................ dienn

The two and ummi.

Dependence...
Interdependence...

That explained Lienn and Rienn current mode,
when ummi had to stay in hospital, almost a week now.

Both sides came to help out,
but noticeably Lienn began to show her true colour
for being effective on her own
and for being protective of her little sister.
and they both nestle in my arms at night.

Ummi wasn't feeling too well.
Her recent declining mood is the symptom of something far deeper.
The little ones had learnt how to pray for ummi.





..... dienn.

Go, turn and turn.

It's Masjid Bandar Baru Bangi on the right

my home

It's Az-zahrah on the left
and soon a petrol kiosk

Upon the traffic light
I will take left
and maintaining right

I cant speed
because soon I will take heed
for a good right.

and after a few swerve
I will reach a place
I call home.

and always to be greeted by Lienn
with a kiss on my hand.
and Rienn is too young to care.

Ummi will reach home first
I will get home last.


and further up
is a place where I sweat it out
over weekends
with friends
playing like little kids
counting stroke after stroke
and always on the lookout
where would the white ball land to.









dienn.........................................
[ next:  With a robe of saffron hue ]